what to do with myself
since justin went back to work sunday, and my house was already clean, and i don't go back to work until the 7th of april, i'm at loose ends. i actually did the laundry myself and then - gasp! -ironed all of our clean clothes that should be ironed. and then, i pulled all of the unironed clothes out of our closet to iron them!!!! clearly, i need professional help.
so i came to jacksonville to see my mom and my sister and my new nephew for a couple of days. my visit turned out really to be just for one day, since i have to go back first thing tomorrow morning or be stuck here until monday. but it was a good one day. my mom went into her office for half a day, and i slept in (by her standards - 11:00 has become my standard wake-up time), then i called my sister and she brought jay over.
i am happy to report that he has grown into his face and no longer resembles buddy hackett. he is such a sweetie and a snuggler; i feel a little guilty for my prenatal prediction that he would be a brute (to johannes's sweetie-pie). he is huge, but he has a very sweet temperament.
granted, i did take a xanax before they came over - i didn't want to spend another day like the last two, where i got teary at every little thing - but i was really happy today. after they went home tonight, my mom asked if it had been difficult for me to see jay, but it hadn't. i did think a couple of times about how much i had looked forward to jay and hans growing up together and being exactly the same age and always having each other, so it made me a little sad, this time for jay, that he wouldn't have hans to be his buddy. but jay being healthy and happy and just plain alive doesn't take anything away from me. it's not his fault, or his parents' fault, or really anyone's fault, that hans died.
i look forward to having all day friday and saturday and sunday morning with justin, but i wish the flights were not all so full that i have to leave early tomorrow; i will be getting home just as he leaves for work and so will have another day home by myself.
maybe i could strip and refinish the floors tomorrow...
so i came to jacksonville to see my mom and my sister and my new nephew for a couple of days. my visit turned out really to be just for one day, since i have to go back first thing tomorrow morning or be stuck here until monday. but it was a good one day. my mom went into her office for half a day, and i slept in (by her standards - 11:00 has become my standard wake-up time), then i called my sister and she brought jay over.
i am happy to report that he has grown into his face and no longer resembles buddy hackett. he is such a sweetie and a snuggler; i feel a little guilty for my prenatal prediction that he would be a brute (to johannes's sweetie-pie). he is huge, but he has a very sweet temperament.
granted, i did take a xanax before they came over - i didn't want to spend another day like the last two, where i got teary at every little thing - but i was really happy today. after they went home tonight, my mom asked if it had been difficult for me to see jay, but it hadn't. i did think a couple of times about how much i had looked forward to jay and hans growing up together and being exactly the same age and always having each other, so it made me a little sad, this time for jay, that he wouldn't have hans to be his buddy. but jay being healthy and happy and just plain alive doesn't take anything away from me. it's not his fault, or his parents' fault, or really anyone's fault, that hans died.
i look forward to having all day friday and saturday and sunday morning with justin, but i wish the flights were not all so full that i have to leave early tomorrow; i will be getting home just as he leaves for work and so will have another day home by myself.
maybe i could strip and refinish the floors tomorrow...
posted by laura at 11:36 PM
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