more jekyll and hyde

my vision is getting skewy. i was nauseated several times but have not actually thrown up today. i'm so happy! i'm so scared! i'm so psycho!

i am not only psycho but also psyched - about "commander in chief". i watched it tonight, in a rare moment of television weakness, and it's melodramatic, sure, but even a flaming liberal like me had to fight the urge to stand up and salute periodically. it's fluffy claptrap. and i liked it.

*****

there's a new member to the club. she's one of my field reps; she's been with my company for about a month. she's based out in a culturally-southern metropolitan market and has a name that screams honky-tonk angel. i found out today she lost her first child, her daughter, in april. she confided this to my motherly co-worker who inspires these sorts of confidences from everyone, including me. her daughter contracted a virus in utero, was born prematurely, and died four days later. my co-worker told her she needed to talk to me and briefly told her about hans. she said she'd like to talk to me, but she didn't want to make me uncomfortable. my co-worker suggested i call her this evening.

the thing is, i haven't exactly bonded with her already. she's a little high strung. maybe it's her personality, or maybe it's grief. i don't know, but she's high maintenance, professionally. we get things done, but i don't think we're each other's favorite. so i sent her an e-mail instead. i briefly summarized the hans story and then a little bit about this pregnancy. this woman is my age and desperate to get pregnant again but terrified she won't be able to. talk about deja vu, eh?

i asked her what her daugher's name was and told her i'm here to listen. we'll see what happens.