we're really sorry about your son, mr lauralu
We often joke about this: Laura and I have differant last names, and we can generally screen unwanted solicitations, or other nonsense, simply by who one asks for on the phone. Occasionally, folks who don't know us well, or who only know us professionally will address us as the Justin's or the Laura's - and this is fine, either way.
It's just that when we're speaking of Johannes, well, his name: Johannes Christian J, this means everything to me. As I've mentioned, it's a name (well, initials) that have been passed down from my own father to me, and me to my son - and lately, I'm realizing that this is all that I have with him. I'll never get to see his fingerpaintings on my refridgerator, but we'll always share our name.
Saturday was really rough: I'm finally feeling the anger that we all expect to come with grief and I've no where to place it. I'm one pissed off mofo, and it's about everything, anything, and nothing in particular, which pisses me off to no end. I guess I'm just a time bomb.
Anyhow, as I was laying on the coach, feeling sorry for myself, Laura handed me a copy of the HOPE newsletter (a grief group for dead baby mommas and dead baby daddies); on the back page of the newsletters there is always a memorial for the lost children from the group.
Some babies have names, others don't (which saddens me greatly, but then again, who am I to say how one grieves). The envelope was addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Laura, hell, everything from the hospital is addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Laura, some of which is directed to some chick named Amy. I don't think that I know her.
My greatest fear is that come February, our sons name will be memorialized by HOPE, and that it'll read Johannes Christian L, which would be a great name, for someone elses child, but that's not our son.
Am I being insane? I could call and insist that they don't fuck up our kids name, but I really don't want to make that call ... this is something that should just be, I have other things to freak out about, I just want what should be, to be, without any effort. Atleast not of my own effort.
I guess this is just a really long winded way of asking Laura, if you could do me a favor and make that call, or place that email?
By the way ... my anger thing is temporarily gone, as I'm pretty much simply trying to recover from the worlds worst hangover. We had a little dinner party last night, Randy and Jenny were in town and as is customary when Randy and I get together, we listen to lot's of music and get piss drunk. Good times, I am telling you ... our best count (and Laura and Jenny, as well as Mike and Jim were helping) was 6 bottles of wine, 4 bottles of port and two bottles of beer (the last of which I wish i would have said no! no mixing Einstein)
Between port and beer, we decided to put on an airguitar (and air basoon, and air oboe) show! It seemed like a good idea at the time, and from the pictures, it looks like we had a hella time. Děkuji Uz Jsme Doma, there is no band in the world that can make me smile, nor rock out an oboe, quite like you.
I'd also like to send my best regards to David, commonly known as Mr. Toni, as they play the waiting game.
It's just that when we're speaking of Johannes, well, his name: Johannes Christian J, this means everything to me. As I've mentioned, it's a name (well, initials) that have been passed down from my own father to me, and me to my son - and lately, I'm realizing that this is all that I have with him. I'll never get to see his fingerpaintings on my refridgerator, but we'll always share our name.
Saturday was really rough: I'm finally feeling the anger that we all expect to come with grief and I've no where to place it. I'm one pissed off mofo, and it's about everything, anything, and nothing in particular, which pisses me off to no end. I guess I'm just a time bomb.
Anyhow, as I was laying on the coach, feeling sorry for myself, Laura handed me a copy of the HOPE newsletter (a grief group for dead baby mommas and dead baby daddies); on the back page of the newsletters there is always a memorial for the lost children from the group.
Some babies have names, others don't (which saddens me greatly, but then again, who am I to say how one grieves). The envelope was addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Laura, hell, everything from the hospital is addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Laura, some of which is directed to some chick named Amy. I don't think that I know her.
My greatest fear is that come February, our sons name will be memorialized by HOPE, and that it'll read Johannes Christian L, which would be a great name, for someone elses child, but that's not our son.
Am I being insane? I could call and insist that they don't fuck up our kids name, but I really don't want to make that call ... this is something that should just be, I have other things to freak out about, I just want what should be, to be, without any effort. Atleast not of my own effort.
I guess this is just a really long winded way of asking Laura, if you could do me a favor and make that call, or place that email?
By the way ... my anger thing is temporarily gone, as I'm pretty much simply trying to recover from the worlds worst hangover. We had a little dinner party last night, Randy and Jenny were in town and as is customary when Randy and I get together, we listen to lot's of music and get piss drunk. Good times, I am telling you ... our best count (and Laura and Jenny, as well as Mike and Jim were helping) was 6 bottles of wine, 4 bottles of port and two bottles of beer (the last of which I wish i would have said no! no mixing Einstein)
Between port and beer, we decided to put on an airguitar (and air basoon, and air oboe) show! It seemed like a good idea at the time, and from the pictures, it looks like we had a hella time. Děkuji Uz Jsme Doma, there is no band in the world that can make me smile, nor rock out an oboe, quite like you.
I'd also like to send my best regards to David, commonly known as Mr. Toni, as they play the waiting game.
posted by justinian at 4:46 PM
1 Comments:
You so TOTALLY have to contact them and make sure they get Hans' name right! How often does he get to have his name in print? These things are important - I know for a fact the HOPE folks don't like to mess those things up.
I think they got Calvin's name wrong the first time, we had just joined shortly before his first birthday and it came in under the wire. It was just "Calvin Thayer" or something. No, it wasn't terrible. But it was wrong.
Post a Comment
<< Home