gee, your hair smells terrific! also, therapy reconsidered
i can smell hans today. i don't know what triggered the memory, but there it is. i haven't smelled him in months. it's lovely. the best way i can describe it is a mix of hospital antiseptic, toasted walnuts and old-school crystal bic pen ink. everyone should smell so good. if they did, the world would be a better place.
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i'm re-thinking therapy, at least for now. since we've officially decided to wait until january to work on the next heir to our throne, i think i want a break from thinking too much more about it. writing about it nearly every day already serves as my emotional metamucil, so therapy seems like more melt-on-the-tongue zofran (see september's fecal incontinence escapades if you need help translating).
i went online to read about a workbook the new therapist suggested, "mind over mood," and i think what it contains are techniques i already know but just haven't been ready to re-deploy lately. it doesn't seem too encouraging.
i don't think i'm going to cancel my appointment next week. i want to know what the therapist had in mind when she talked about the concept of having another project, one which i can control. but then i think i'm going to take a break until the first of the year. it will give me some time to bake a cake (as lorem ipsum suggested) or maybe bake a bunch of cakes and take a cake decorating class or something similarly inane. inanity seems like a good idea through the holidays.
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i'm re-thinking therapy, at least for now. since we've officially decided to wait until january to work on the next heir to our throne, i think i want a break from thinking too much more about it. writing about it nearly every day already serves as my emotional metamucil, so therapy seems like more melt-on-the-tongue zofran (see september's fecal incontinence escapades if you need help translating).
i went online to read about a workbook the new therapist suggested, "mind over mood," and i think what it contains are techniques i already know but just haven't been ready to re-deploy lately. it doesn't seem too encouraging.
i don't think i'm going to cancel my appointment next week. i want to know what the therapist had in mind when she talked about the concept of having another project, one which i can control. but then i think i'm going to take a break until the first of the year. it will give me some time to bake a cake (as lorem ipsum suggested) or maybe bake a bunch of cakes and take a cake decorating class or something similarly inane. inanity seems like a good idea through the holidays.
posted by laura at 1:07 PM
2 Comments:
mmmm...cake
Yeah, cake! I just ate some halloween candy, but cake would be wonderful.
"Mind Over Mood" was the book that I used during my therapy this time around. It is kind of cheesy and elementary sometimes, and I actually needed my therapist to help me stay focused on the content rather than the delivery. I recommend it, but I also think you should stick with seeing the therapist too.
Therapy was a lot different than blogging, or journaling, or talking to the untrained (no matter how well meaning). Therapy was WORK for me, and doing the MOM (how ironic!) book with someone breathing down my neck to get it done every week was important to me, it kept me on track and made me do the work of healing in a concrete, well-defined way. If I hadn't done it with someone, on a regular basis I wouldn't have done the work and I might be okay, but I wouldn't have the insight into myself that I have now, I wouldn't have the tools I have now to deal with things, and I don't think I'd be as clear about some things and feel as positive as I do now. And I sincerely think this pregnancy would be a lot more stressful than it is, and that would piss me off and if I didn't know and hadn't dealt with my chronic anger I'd be right back where I was.
Sorry, I'm rambling, I'm a bit brain dead after teaching all day.
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