toothless tuesday
i applied to a school yesterday. i completed my application, my essay, and my app fee. i'm working on my transcripts. it's probably too late to start in the spring semester, but i should be in class by the summer. the wheels are turning.
*****
is this year over yet???
i woke up this morning, rolled over, threw an arm over justin, puckered up to kiss his ear...but it didn't feel right. i was missing a front tooth. i kid you not.
panic and hysteria ensued.
when i was eight, i had a run-in with the trapeze bar on my red-and-white-striped swing-set. the trapeze bar won. i've had a crown ever since.
the last time it was re-done was december, 1992, when i bit into a piece of pizza crust, hours before my cousin's wedding (the same cousin i ran into at the hospital last week!) in florida. another cousin's wife rushed me to their dentist who came in on a saturday morning to give me a temporary crown so i wouldn't look like a freak in the family pictures that day. when i got back home to texas, i got a new permanent crown, which has been firmly affixed, lo, these many years, until sometime last night when it just got tired of adhering to the little toothlet i have left.
nothing like finding one's tooth in bed next to one.
but at least i found it. if a new crown would have been required, my wallet would have been sorely squeezed. what i owed after insurance for re-adhering the crown: $7. i wish all medical procedures only cost me $7. i just got the insurance statement for the d&c, and it's not pretty. if i had money to burn, sure, i'd be happy to pay for all kinds of dead-baby-related procedures. or not. not that it matters, because i don't have money to burn, anyway.
so my crown is back on although not without some trauma. i had not one but two, count 'em, two breakdowns in the dentist's office, as i explained to the hygienist and then the dentist why i haven't been flossing for most of the last year and a half (rampant unsuccessful pregnancy-related nausea triggered by anything being stuck in my mouth - and keep your tasteless comments to yourself, thank you - i've already thought them all, anyway), but they were kind about it, and at least i won't be denied college admission because the interviewer takes me for a toothless hayseed.*
* with apologies to any of our lovely, urbane and intellectual readers who might be missing one or more teeth.
*****
is this year over yet???
i woke up this morning, rolled over, threw an arm over justin, puckered up to kiss his ear...but it didn't feel right. i was missing a front tooth. i kid you not.
panic and hysteria ensued.
when i was eight, i had a run-in with the trapeze bar on my red-and-white-striped swing-set. the trapeze bar won. i've had a crown ever since.
the last time it was re-done was december, 1992, when i bit into a piece of pizza crust, hours before my cousin's wedding (the same cousin i ran into at the hospital last week!) in florida. another cousin's wife rushed me to their dentist who came in on a saturday morning to give me a temporary crown so i wouldn't look like a freak in the family pictures that day. when i got back home to texas, i got a new permanent crown, which has been firmly affixed, lo, these many years, until sometime last night when it just got tired of adhering to the little toothlet i have left.
nothing like finding one's tooth in bed next to one.
but at least i found it. if a new crown would have been required, my wallet would have been sorely squeezed. what i owed after insurance for re-adhering the crown: $7. i wish all medical procedures only cost me $7. i just got the insurance statement for the d&c, and it's not pretty. if i had money to burn, sure, i'd be happy to pay for all kinds of dead-baby-related procedures. or not. not that it matters, because i don't have money to burn, anyway.
so my crown is back on although not without some trauma. i had not one but two, count 'em, two breakdowns in the dentist's office, as i explained to the hygienist and then the dentist why i haven't been flossing for most of the last year and a half (rampant unsuccessful pregnancy-related nausea triggered by anything being stuck in my mouth - and keep your tasteless comments to yourself, thank you - i've already thought them all, anyway), but they were kind about it, and at least i won't be denied college admission because the interviewer takes me for a toothless hayseed.*
* with apologies to any of our lovely, urbane and intellectual readers who might be missing one or more teeth.
posted by laura at 5:31 PM
6 Comments:
The funniest part about all of this? Last night I was eating dulce de leche icecream and quite enjoying myself, thank you very much.
The spoon decided to tap my tooth, which hurt like a mutha ... anyhow, when I was done whining about how much it hurt, I mentioned to Laura how classy I'd look if I had really lost a tooth!
I'm much cooler than Miss Cleo.
Apologies to the toothless...but not the hayseeds? hmmm...now I'll have to rethink my not laughing at the thought of you without your tooth.
Did you get a picture?
I had an accident at about age eight also in Washington, DC involving the Lincoln Memorial, a barrier chain and a bus. As bonding was primitive then, I had my brand-new permanent teeth capped and a few veneered later.
If the swing set doesn't knock your teeth out, politics will. It's a dirty business.
Yes, we want photos.
i made certain there were no pictures. in fact, i was careful to not let justin get a full view of my semi-vacant mouth. i'd like to have sex again.
me too.
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